- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet fo Jim Denham.
- Jim Denham doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
- There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Jim Denham has allowed to live.
- Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Jim Denham.
- Jim Denham does not sleep. He blogs.
- Jim Denham is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
- Jim Denham is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
- Jim Denham counted to infinity - twice.
- There is no chin behind Jim Denham’s beard. There is only another ESB.
- When Jim Denham does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
- Jim Denham is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
- Jim Denham’s hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
- There is no such thing as global warming. Jim Denham was cold, so he turned the sun up.
- Jim Denham can lead a horse to water AND make it drink ESB.
- Jim Denham doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
- Jim Denham gave Mona Lisa that smile.
- Jim Denham can slam a revolving door.
- Jim Denham does not get frostbite. Jim Denham bites frost.
- Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after reading Shiraz Socialist.
- Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Jimtatorship.
Archive for April, 2007
02
Apr
